I just found out that I got hit with the gestational diabetes bug (GDM), and boy was I mad. I don’t fit the bill of the likely candidates. I began pregnancy at a healthy weight, have had healthy weight gain throughout, I eat right, I exercise, and I don’t have any personal or family history with the disease. It is yet one more thing that I have no control over. Ugh! At the end of the day, the onset of GDM comes down to a hormone unique to pregnancy and affects 18-20% of pregnant women (A friend who is also pregnant recently called hormones “chemical terrorists” and I’ve never heard a more accurate description).
I’ve been so bogged down in the negative, from how this pregnancy happened, to every ache and pain I’ve had, the physical limitations, the lack of sleep, and now the diagnosis of GDM. It was just one more thing for me to add to my ever expanding list of complaints.
I was hit with the realization that I lost the ability to see the positive in anything in my life right now. No matter what good thing comes up, I’m just a negative nancy. It hit me that I probably have a mild case of the third trimester blues. I say mild, because as soon as I became aware of my negativity, I decided I needed to snap out of it (If you feel completely stuck in a negative rut, talk to your doctor. It could be an indicator of something more serious).
I was super annoyed that in the last (aka WORST) trimester, I couldn’t lounge around like the whale I felt and eat ice cream and cake. I was annoyed that when I’m in the final stretch of being too tired to do most anything and want to throw in the towel on homemaking, I now have to carb count, cook a lot more, and get more exercise. Top it off with the most annoying thing of all, that I have to prick my finger 4 times a day. I wanted to phone in the final stretch, but now I have to be extra diligent.
BUT I know that sitting around eating ice cream and binging Parks and Rec doesn’t really make me feel good beyond a fleeting moment. It isn’t a good idea to do at any time of my life, much less now. What’s funny is even after a week of carb counting and taking daily walks, I really do feel better.
Turns out having GDM is helping me change my attitude. Didn’t see that one coming!
I’ve always been told that if you want to change your outlook, make a list of everything you’re thankful for. Practice an “attitude of gratitude.” It’s cheesy for sure, but it’s annoyingly effective.
I’m done focusing on the negative. Here’s what I’m grateful for.
For warm spring days, full of beautiful flowers.
For a happy, spunky, content baby girl who makes me laugh all day and challenges me to always put myself second.
For a loving, understanding and hard working husband who bears with the roller coaster of pregnancy and is always ready to help.
For a wonderful place to live in a beautiful part of the country.
For incredible medical care that is thorough and keeps me and my baby safe and healthy.
For friends who’ve become like family.
For a family who supports, encourages and loves unconditionally.
There’s definitely a lot that I have to be thankful for, and I have 9 remaining weeks to make every single one of those things my new focus.
He fills my life with good things so that I stay young and strong like an eagle. Psalm 103:5