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Jesus made it. My kids do it. I drink it. In vino veritas.

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  • Home
  • Contact
  • Life Abundantly Series
  • NFP Support
  • the SAHM Talk Back! series

Abstinence: The Great NFP Turn Off

By: Emily January 16, 2020January 18, 2020 Catholic CultureLeave a Comment on Abstinence: The Great NFP Turn Off

Sex is both confined to and the seal of the sacrament of marriage. So how on earth can the Catholic Church justify periodic abstinence alone for planning families – no matter what?

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the SAHM Talk Back! series

By: Emily November 10, 2019December 30, 2019 Family, Guest Writers, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is5 Comments on the SAHM Talk Back! series

In this candid, sassy and thoughtful series, Emily and Victoria respond to five of the most common questions they’ve fielded as SAHM. From giving up their career, to what we do all day, we are talking back.

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Life Abundantly: Real NFP Stories

By: Emily July 15, 2019December 30, 2019 Guest Writers, NFP, NFP Awareness Week 2019, Tell It Like It Is2 Comments on Life Abundantly: Real NFP Stories

What is NFP? Stewardship. For NFP Awareness Week, I shared 7 interviews that tell the truth about NFP – the good, the gritty, and the glorious.

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The W(h)iner

A few tidbits about me

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About the Blog

What do I have to whine about? In a word, solidarity.

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Run the World

My Dad once told me…

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Merry Christmas from Total W(h)ine!

By: Emily December 20, 2019January 11, 2020
Catholic CultureLeave a Comment on Merry Christmas from Total W(h)ine!

Click for a note of thanks to each of you, who have been a gift to me this past year!

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Catholic CultureLeave a Comment on Merry Christmas from Total W(h)ine!

Can you support feminism as a SAHM?

By: Emily December 12, 2019December 20, 2019
Catholic Culture, Guest Writers, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is3 Comments on Can you support feminism as a SAHM?

In a word, yes. But maybe the question should be turned back on itself – can feminism support a woman’s right to choose to stay home?

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Catholic Culture, Guest Writers, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is3 Comments on Can you support feminism as a SAHM?

Don't you hate sacrificing your career?

By: Emily December 10, 2019December 20, 2019
Family, Guest Writers, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is1 Comment on Don't you hate sacrificing your career?

Emily and Victoria just have one thing to say to this one: what exactly is wrong with sacrifice?
Just kidding, they have a lot more to say. Read on.

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Family, Guest Writers, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is1 Comment on Don't you hate sacrificing your career?

Are your kids the center of your life?

By: Emily December 8, 2019December 20, 2019
Catholic Culture1 Comment on Are your kids the center of your life?

The choice to stay home is all about the kids… sort of.

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Catholic Culture1 Comment on Are your kids the center of your life?

5 Ways to Celebrate Advent (and still put up your tree!)

By: Emily November 21, 2019December 5, 2019
Catholic Culture, Family, Tips and Tricks2 Comments on 5 Ways to Celebrate Advent (and still put up your tree!)

Simple, easy ideas to help you prepare for the wonder and joy of Christmas.

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Catholic Culture, Family, Tips and Tricks2 Comments on 5 Ways to Celebrate Advent (and still put up your tree!)

How to Make a Hanging Advent Wreath

By: Emily November 21, 2019December 5, 2019
Crafts, Motherhood, Tips and Tricks1 Comment on How to Make a Hanging Advent Wreath

For those of us with tiny spaces, limited surface area, and lots of curious little hands!

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Crafts, Motherhood, Tips and Tricks1 Comment on How to Make a Hanging Advent Wreath

Do you feel like you wasted your degree?

By: Emily November 14, 2019November 24, 2019
Family, Guest Writers, Marriage, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is

Emily and Victoria shoot back at the question that has them wondering: If women are equal to men, isn’t their education just as important?

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Family, Guest Writers, Marriage, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is

What Do You Do All Day?

By: Emily November 13, 2019November 24, 2019
Family, Guest Writers, Marriage, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is

What do we do all day? And more importantly, why does no one want to hear the answer?

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Family, Guest Writers, Marriage, Motherhood, Tell It Like It Is

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Hey y’all! I’m Emily, the w(h)iner in chief. I’m so glad you’re here!

I'm a Louisiana native married to a Wisconsin boy, living the SAHM life with our two hedonists in a DC suburb. Honesty is my game, scotch is my drink, and my faith is a joy. Laissez les bon temps roller!

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“The Lord said to me: You are my servant, Israel, through whom I show my glory.” // Isaiah 49: 3 . Christmas is officially over, and we are now in the beginning of Ordinary time. There’s absolutely nothing “ordinary” about this season. Don’t let the name fool you. I love how @everysacredsunday opens each liturgical season with reflection questions, and for this season, I was challenged to think about how I can make the ordinary extraordinary. . The opening verse from the first reading today showed me just how to do that. Now is just as good a time as any to recommit to being God's servants. Now is just as good a time as any to let the glory of the Lord shine through us. These next few weeks leading up to Lent are perfect for us to work on making ordinary moments extraordinary, by letting God use us to shower others with his love. With a warm smile. With a kind word. With a thoughtful question. With expressions of gratitude. With patience in a difficult moment. . Now. Today. This moment. How can you make the ordinary extraordinary? . . #totalwhine #ess #essfam #notsoordinary
✨ NEW BLOG POST ✨ Abstinence: The Great NFP Turn Off . I'm about as candid as I can be in this post! Here's what I cover: . + Why abstinence only for planning families? . + What is marriage . + Why the "honeymoon effect" is unrealistic + And of course, what *can* you do when sex is off the table . It's a much longer post than my usual, but it's such an important topic that is all too often glossed over. Tap the link in my bio for the full post! . . #FABMfriday #totalwhine #realNFP #shareNFP
It may not be Friday, but considering I've had quite an influx of new faces, I figured a brief "who the heck is this chick?" might be in order. . So, Hello! I'm Emily, and I'm so happy you're here. Here's 5 facts about me: . . ✨ I was born and raised in Baton Rouge, and at this time of year especially, I'd give anything for a parade, a crawfish boil, and some really good king cake. Also, Geaux Tigers, the National Champions!!!! 💜💛 . . ✨ I'm married to Nick. He's from Wisconsin, and we met working at a non-profit in DC. If you had asked me years ago to describe my husband, it wouldn't have been him. Funny thing though, he's kind of perfect for me, in all the unexpected ways. His greatest flaw is thinking food only exists to keep you alive. I've spent 7 solid years trying to convince him that food is the joie de vivre! His conversion has been an uphill battle. Pray for us 😉 . . ✨ We have two kiddos, Evelyn and Thomas, and we didn't plan either of them. NFP FTW amiright? Seriously though, they're the greatest gifts because they made us question everything, including our faith and the goodness of God, and through all that, deepened our love of God and each other. . . . ✨ I have two passions: authentic femininity and telling the truth about NFP. You'll find that vast majority of my posts here cover one of those subjects through the Catholic lens. . . ✨ My greatest joy is connecting with each of you in the comments or DMs and being able to tell you that whatever you are going through - you aren't alone! I hope that doesn't sound trite. It's the honest to goodness truth. . . ✨And one more fact just for fun (that's called lagniappe 😉) - My drink of choice is scotch 🥃 . . ✨ . Your turn! Introduce yourself in the comments. It's always fun finding out that we share an unexpected connection. 👇
“And a voice came from the heavens, “You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.” At once the Spirit drove him out into the desert,and he remained in the desert for forty days, tempted by Satan.” // Mark 1:11-13 Today’s gospel was from Matthew, but Mark's language to describe what happens after Jesus’ baptism is quite remarkable. . Immediately after God the Father declared Jesus to be his beloved Son in whom he is well pleased, the Spirit “drove" Jesus into the desert. “Drove” is a word with connotations of violence and resistance. Perhaps just like in the agony in the garden, Jesus would have preferred God’s will to be accomplished another way. It would make total sense because spiritually speaking, the desert is the feeling of abandonment by God. It’s dry, it’s harsh, and oases are often discovered to be nothing more than mirages. So why in the world is Jesus driven there after such a declaration? . I think this illuminates something very important about spiritual dryness. It isn’t a curse or a punishment. It is a gift. It is precisely where God the Father will plant deep seeds of faith, and will give us the strength to accomplish our mission. It is a time where God draws us paradoxically into a deeper intimacy with Him, turning our relationship into one where the Beloved is loved simply for Who He is, not for how He makes us feel or what He does for us. . The period of spiritual darkness I experienced for the duration of my second pregnancy has been the source of so much abundantly good fruit in my life and in my faith. God drove me into a desert so that he could take our relationship to the next level. Make no mistake, it was very painful, but it has absolutely been made beautiful, and miraculously, I am grateful for it. . Have you ever experienced spiritual dryness or darkness? Have you felt like it was something you needed to pray your way out of, or a curse? Know that the opposite is in fact true. You are his beloved child, and he is well pleased with you. He is taking your relationship to the next level, giving you a share in a part of his humanity. Don’t pray your way through it. Pray instead for the grace to accept it.
NFP... FABM... FAM… You’ve seen these acronyms floating around, but maybe you aren’t sure what the difference is. . NFP stands for “Natural Family Planning”, and is most commonly used by Catholics to describe the various fertility awareness methods. . FAM stands for “Fertility Awareness Method” and is used mainly by non-Catholics, the chief distinction being that barrier methods/ withdrawal are utilized during fertile times to avoid pregnancy. . FABM stands for “Fertility Awareness-Based Methods” and can be used in place of “NFP”. . NFP, FABM and FAM all describe the same methods: Marquette, Creighton, Billings, STM, and FEMM. . Now, why do I use FABM instead of NFP for my #FABMfriday hashtag? . For starters “family planning” just doesn’t accurately describe this lifestyle. Whether like me you have some surprise babes, or like 1 in 8 women are unable to have children, those who practice fertility awareness find out the hard way that it does not give us control over our fertility. Success and failure isn’t black and white like it is with artificial birth control. Success is defined as remaining open to the will of God no matter what, and make no mistake, the life of faith requires submission. It was certainly true for me that calling this “family planning” made me forget that I am merely the steward of my fertility, while God remains the master. . More than that, “family planning” is incredibly limiting of the scope of fertility awareness. As the science behind it advances, we are starting to understand just how much our fertility is an indication of our overall health and well-being. It can be a diagnostic tool for all manner of things, from identifying the root causes of painful, heavy and irregular periods, to understanding the effects of stress and diet, information available to any woman from puberty to menopause. Furthermore, studies show that fertility awareness increases respect for the dignity and worth of one’s sexuality, even decreasing rates of promiscuity when taught early. . What do you think about all this? Do you think NFP is the best acronym to use, or do you prefer FABM? Share in the comments👇
Hi y’all! For this #FABMfriday, I’m getting up close and personal cause I have a little favor to ask. Keep reading . I’m still on cloud 9 after @youmeandnfp named me their person of the year. It was such a gift to be honored, and man, it definitely has me thinking about how to keep my NFP game strong here in the new year! . I started #FABMfriday so that I could regularly share things I’ve learned and offer encouragement around NFP. As I develop new content for my blog and this platform, I need your help! I’ve got a few poll questions up in my stories for you to answer that will help me craft content that will better serve you. Some are the multiple choice types, but there is no right or wrong answer. I won’t be sharing your responses (unless you want me to or I ask first). . My goal here is to let you know that this radical expression of faithfulness is one of the hardest things you’ll ever undertake - and that struggling is completely normal! Jesus told us following him would mean accepting a cross, and that cross includes our marriages and our sex lives. Learning this does not diminish the truth or worthiness of Church teaching, rather it magnifies its beauty, something that’s frankly only revealed with time. . Thanks in advance for all your help! . #FABM #NFP #fertilityawareness #stewardship #normalizeNFP #sharenfp #solidarity #totalwhine . . . Repping my “Marseilles” necklace from @thelittlecatholic_ that I haven’t taken off since I got it as an early Christmas present. Early, because I couldn’t wait till Christmas to wear it 🤗
“The beginning of a new year is an opportunity for improvement. It makes little difference what the past has been, for we are not to look back to see if the furrow be crooked. What matters most is the sanctification of the now moment. Time is so precious that God doles it out second by second. If life in the past has been evil, the new year is an opportunity for penance. In such a way is time redeemed. If life, however, has been virtuous, the new year is an opportunity for greater self-perfection.” // Archbishop Fulton Sheen . ✨ . Here we are at the start of a whole new year and a whole new decade. . Having just celebrated turning 30 a few days ago, this is also the start of a whole new decade for me. No disrespect to my favorite Bishop Sheen, but I’ve definitely been going back through the last 10 years, thinking about all that’s happened and how much I’ve changed. . The 2010s were a decade of big adventures, of self discovery, of losing my faith and finding it again (after a run-in with an atheist as irony would have it). A decade of rejecting some huge crosses and later watching amazed at the beauty that God wove out of them. The decade I became a wife and a mother, and through both, started to become most fully myself. The decade I discovered gifts and talents I had never cultivated before, and laughed as I realized how God had been planting the seeds for them my whole life. . After looking back, I can’t help but stare ahead to this new year and new decade with hopeful optimism. My past has had its ups and downs, but it got me here, and I have to admit, I like what “here” is. . I’ve never been one for New Year’s resolutions, but if I had to pick something based on all I’ve learned in the last 10 years it would simply be this: hold nothing back from God. . So here’s looking at you, 2020! May you be another great one. Happy New Year! 🎉🍾✨ . Did you make New Year’s resolution? Share yours in the comments 👇
#Repost @youmeandnfp • • • • • • We are excited to announce a new tradition for You Me and NFP of choosing a person of the year that is transforming the cultural landscape of NFP. This year we our honored to share an amazing woman who is so genuine and authentic with her faith and love of the NFP lifestyle. A big congratulations to Emily Frase from @totalwhine_ Thank you for helping normalizing NFP in our culture! We are praying for you to continue to be a fearless voice for NFP. View our story to learn more about Emily! . ✨ . I am beyond grateful to the ladies of You, Me and NFP for this honor! This is such a beautiful gift, one that means the world to me. I am so looking forward to continue to #shareNFP with you in the new year!
May the celebration of the birth of Our Savior bring renewed hope and joy to you and yours this blessed season! . Merry Christmas! 🎄✨

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